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Dalhousie's Satirical Newspaper

Dalhousie's Satirical Newspaper

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Latest Post

Dalhousie Erects Vagina Monument To Mirror Marine Venus Penis Statue  Dalhousie Introduces New Course Registration System With Official Ticketmaster Partnership The HRM White Monster Theory Intramural Athlete Retires From Sport Due To Pressure From Fan (Singular) A Guide To Modern Dating With An Oedipus Complex

Fun things to do while you’re (still) stuck at home 

September 18, 2025 The Dalhousie Mackerel

Fun things to do while you’re (still) stuck at home Halifax, N.S. — The Dalhousie Faculty Association and board of governors are set to continue their epic battle to decide…

The state of Dal Campus amid DFA lockout

September 18, 2025 The Dalhousie Mackerel

Halifax, N.S. — Dalhousie University campus, once bustling with the sounds of sleepy undergrads shuffling to morning lectures, has transformed into a haunted ghost town. Clang, clang, clang, honk, honk…

Thinkpiece: Why doesn’t anyone like me?

September 5, 2025 The Dalhousie Mackerel

Written by the Killam Memorial Library HALIFAX, N.S. — I try not to be a pick-me on here, but I am starting to think something is seriously wrong with me.…

Inside the lives of mature students

September 5, 2025 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, N.S. — Between the recent pandemic, rising cost of living and shifting social attitudes, there are a multitude of reasons that someone may take an extended leave from academia.…

All the back-to-school essentials for King’s students

September 5, 2025 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, N.S. — Back to school is upon us, and whether you are a new or returning student, it can be an overwhelming task to go shopping for everything you…

Dalhousie board of governors announces Dalhousie University x Labubu collaboration in attempt to distract from DFA lockout 

September 5, 2025 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, N.S. — Dalhousie University has been under a microscope lately due to ongoing contract negotiations between the Dalhousie Faculty Association and the Dalhousie board of governors, resulting in a…

Mackerel Purity Test

April 1, 2025 The Dalhousie Mackerel

The classic Rice Purity Test has historically served as a segue from O-week to true college life. It’s a chance to bond amongst peers and track the maturation of your…

Foolproof Quiz To Determine What Major You Are

April 1, 2025 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, N.S. — Using the near-forgotten methods of our ancestors (Buzzfeed and teen magazines), The Dalhousie Mackerel has developed a foolproof method of determining your area of study. Just answer…

5 Spicy, Sexy Tips And Tricks From Your Virgin R.A. 

April 1, 2025 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, N.S. — Hey Horndogs, Persephoney here. Writing to you once again from my Howe Hall dorm room. This time with some spicy, sexy tips to help vamp up your…

Jolly Rancher Mocktail Recipe 

April 1, 2025 The Dalhousie Mackerel

Are you ever in the mood for a cocktail but are avoiding alcohol out of concern for your health? Well, try this alcohol free, Jolly Rancher mocktail to satisfy your…

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You missed

Dalhousie Erects Vagina Monument To Mirror Marine Venus Penis Statue 

March 13, 2026 The Dalhousie Mackerel

Dalhousie Introduces New Course Registration System With Official Ticketmaster Partnership

March 13, 2026 The Dalhousie Mackerel

The HRM White Monster Theory

March 13, 2026 The Dalhousie Mackerel

Intramural Athlete Retires From Sport Due To Pressure From Fan (Singular)

March 13, 2026 The Dalhousie Mackerel
Dalhousie's Satirical Newspaper

Dalhousie's Satirical Newspaper

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