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Dalhousie's Satirical Newspaper

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Latest Post

A guide to performative LinkedIn posting Microsoft launches new short-form content feature for Authenticator R.I.P. Sam Creighton Dalhousie to construct ‘terrible noise generators’ outside Howe Hall Students rejoice over LSC bathroom’s indefinite closure

Relatable Professor Switches From Memes to Greentext Format in Lecture Slides

November 3, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS— Beginning this November, Faculty of History professor Dr. Patty Mongsen, long known for the use of humorous memes in her lectures, has taken to formatting her slides in…

Dalhousie Community Reacts To TA Strike

October 28, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

TA Strike Hits Dalhousie Campus

October 28, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS— At midnight on October 19th, Dalhousie campuses lost power — the TAs normally operating stationary bikes hooked up to the grid stopped pedaling. This comes as a direct…

Community Members React To Pizza Bylaw

October 28, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

October 3rd 2022 Halifax Council Summary Document Released

October 28, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

“There’s Just Some Creep Lookin’ at Me”: President Of Dalhousie To Ban Mirrors On Campus Amidst Confusion On How They Work

October 2, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS—The current President of Dalhousie, Dr. Deep Saini, announced earlier this week the complete removal of any and all mirrors present on Dalhousie and Kings campuses. A landmark decision…

Roommate Leaving For Weekend Offers Opportunity For Massive Fridge Space Land Grab

October 2, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS—September 29th: This Thursday morning, roommate Justin McElenney gave the following briefing concerning the ongoing Fridge-Space Territorial Conflict: “After receiving credible intel that my roommate Liam Thomas will be…

Five Ways To Mourn The Queen During The Upcoming Holiday

September 15, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

Colonize a foreign nation Marry your cousin Cover up your son’s sex crimes Have your daughter-in-law murdered Spit on an Irish person We hope whatever strategy you should choose will…

Tree Planters Recovery Program Introduced At Dalhousie For Student’s Who Can’t Stop Talking About Their Summer In The Bush

September 15, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

It’s hard to fault any student for feeling a certain dread as summer comes to a close. However, for one group in particular, this period signifies not only the bleak…

Bookstore Offers To Buy Back Mint Condition Textbook For Three Stale Cigarettes And A Partially Used Burt’s Bees

September 15, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS—Second-year student Natasha Obermayer is excited for the coming school year, having learned many valuable lessons during her first year at Dalhousie. “First and foremost, there is no chance…

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You missed

A guide to performative LinkedIn posting

October 8, 2026 Charlie McLaughlin

Microsoft launches new short-form content feature for Authenticator

October 8, 2026 Zacharie Zegers

R.I.P. Sam Creighton

October 8, 2026 The Dalhousie Mackerel

Dalhousie to construct ‘terrible noise generators’ outside Howe Hall

October 8, 2026 Celeste Boutilier
Dalhousie's Satirical Newspaper

Dalhousie's Satirical Newspaper

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  • Home
  • “There’s Just Some Creep Lookin’ at Me”: President Of Dalhousie To Ban Mirrors On Campus Amidst Confusion On How They Work
  • Archived Issues
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  • Deep Saini Unable To Hear Divest Dal Representatives At Board Meeting Over Sound Of Oil Rig Drilling In President’s Office
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