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Dalhousie's Satirical Newspaper

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Latest Post

A guide to performative LinkedIn posting Microsoft launches new short-form content feature for Authenticator R.I.P. Sam Creighton Dalhousie to construct ‘terrible noise generators’ outside Howe Hall Students rejoice over LSC bathroom’s indefinite closure

Dalhousie Appoints Magic Eight Ball As New President

January 20, 2023 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS — On December 31st, 2022, Deep Saini stepped down as President and Vice-Chancellor of Dalhousie University. Dr. Frank Harvey stepped in during the search for a permanent replacement.…

Deep Saini And The Board Of Governors Choir Release ‘Twelve Days Of Dalmas’ Holiday Carol

December 13, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

On the first day of Dalmas, Deep Saini sent to me A 3% tuition increase On the second day of Dalmas, Deep Saini sent to me Two pizza shops closing…

Student Astounded As Group Project Seemingly Self Completes

November 29, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS — Poppy Longworth, a third year sustainability major, was met with a surprise after logging onto brightspace for the first time in weeks — she received a grade…

Commerce Students On Tuition Hike: “I Hope They Raise It More So I’ll Be Inspired To Grind Even Harder”

November 29, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS — Most Dalhousie students were left frustrated after drastic increases in international tuition were recently announced by Dalhousie administration. However, some students welcome the hikes. “I love it.…

King’s Student Pays $10,000 For Opportunity To Buy And Read 30 Books

November 29, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS—King’s student Bartholomew Wingem was ecstatic when he received his acceptance letter into the First Year Foundation program (FYP). He was one of a lucky few selected to pay…

CUPE 3912 Strike Rehabilitation Program Allowing Former Picketers To March On Dalplex Track And Scream

November 29, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

“DAL HAS DEEP POCKETS! DAL HAS DEEP POCKETS!” Since the end of the CUPE 3912 strike, students have become accustomed to blood curdling chants and wails muffling out the usual…

Gazette Holds Editorial Meeting At The Last Remaining Blockbuster Storefront To Show Solidarity With Other Dying Industries

November 29, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

BEND, OR — With each passing year, fewer students are reading print newspapers, and the Dalhousie Gazette is not immune (for those unaware, the Dalhousie Gazette is the newspaper found…

In The Deep-End: A Glimpse Into The Mind Of President Saini

November 28, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

An exclusive interview with Chudley Chulkins HALIFAX, NS – Like many students, I wasn’t always aware of the impact Dr. Saini had on campus until the past year or so.…

Dalhousie To Integrate Ad Breaks Into Lectures To “Give Thanks To Our Sponsors”

November 11, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS — Dalhousie students are likely to have noticed a new element introduced into recent lectures; paid sponsorships. After seeing the business-savvy decision by Netflix to offer a lower…

Gender Studies Professor Surprised By Class Comprised Entirely Of Appalachian Mountain Men

November 11, 2022 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS— At high noon, a string of saddled horses hitched to the Marion McCain Arts & Social Sciences Building has become a common sight for Professor Judi Jones, the…

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R.I.P. Sam Creighton

October 8, 2026 The Dalhousie Mackerel

Dalhousie to construct ‘terrible noise generators’ outside Howe Hall

October 8, 2026 Celeste Boutilier
Dalhousie's Satirical Newspaper

Dalhousie's Satirical Newspaper

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  • “There’s Just Some Creep Lookin’ at Me”: President Of Dalhousie To Ban Mirrors On Campus Amidst Confusion On How They Work
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