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Dalhousie's Satirical Newspaper

Dalhousie's Satirical Newspaper

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Latest Post

Dalhousie Erects Vagina Monument To Mirror Marine Venus Penis Statue  Dalhousie Introduces New Course Registration System With Official Ticketmaster Partnership The HRM White Monster Theory Intramural Athlete Retires From Sport Due To Pressure From Fan (Singular) A Guide To Modern Dating With An Oedipus Complex

Man Pursues Triple Major In Film, Commerce and Comp Sci After Watching The Godfather, The Wolf Of Wall Street and The Social Network Back To Back

February 1, 2024 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS— Students of Dalhousie University have continued to raise the academic bar this week with the recent announcement of a student aiming to graduate with a triple major. Kyle…

Returning Students Set ‘Hitting Rock-Bottom’ As New Year’s Resolution, So They Can Only Go Up From There

January 19, 2024 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS— Andy Dryer, a second-year business student, set an unusual new year’s resolution, along with some of his classmates. While many approach the new year with a “new and…

Top 6 Ways To Avoid Eye Contact With Your Residence Neighbours

January 19, 2024 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS— As residences reopen this January and students return to their dorm rooms, introverted students are once again facing the challenge of having to walk past their peers in…

English Major Graduates With Zero Job Prospects But Now Has Ability To Write Really Good Fan Fiction

January 19, 2024 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS— In the midst of an ever-expanding STEM job market, the value of an arts degree has diminished in the eyes of the general public. However, for students like…

Dal Commerce Society Announces New Book “Hustling For Dummies: Step By Side Guide For Getting Rich As An Arts Student”

December 8, 2023 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS — Dalhousie University is known for its commerce program, featuring several co-op terms that have launched many alumni into successful careers. This year, the Dal Commerce Society has…

Psychology Prof. Gives Final Exam In Form Of Buzzfeed Personality Quiz

December 8, 2023 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS — A Dalhousie University professor has made news this week for their unconventional final exam. Keegan Prong is a psychology professor here at Dal, and in their Psychology…

Citadel Hill To Be Transformed Into Zipline Hub In Attempt To Improve Public Transit In Halifax

December 1, 2023 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS— The Halifax Regional Municipality has recently taken long-awaited strides to upgrade the city’s public transit infrastructure. Following reports of inaccurate bus schedules and several bus delays, the HRM…

Marine Biology Prof. Revealed To Be Poseidon After Trident Falls Out Of Briefcase

December 1, 2023 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS— The Dalhousie University campus has recently been thrown into disarray after the recent revelation that a faculty member is in fact a member of the Greek Pantheon. Nada…

“Look At Me, I Am The Teacher Now” Failing Student Attempts Intimidation Tactics On Shy Professor

November 24, 2023 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS— Norm Baxter caused quite a stir during his discrete structures exam when he attempted to psychologically overpower his notably very shy professor, Clarence Russell, with the hopes of…

Dalhousie Dining Hall Exposed For Brewing And Serving Same Perpetual Stew Since 1974

November 24, 2023 The Dalhousie Mackerel

HALIFAX, NS— ‘Soup of the Day’ becomes more like soup of the century for Dalhousie University dining halls after numerous complaints about taste and illnesses have exposed them for non-stop…

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You missed

Dalhousie Erects Vagina Monument To Mirror Marine Venus Penis Statue 

March 13, 2026 The Dalhousie Mackerel

Dalhousie Introduces New Course Registration System With Official Ticketmaster Partnership

March 13, 2026 The Dalhousie Mackerel

The HRM White Monster Theory

March 13, 2026 The Dalhousie Mackerel

Intramural Athlete Retires From Sport Due To Pressure From Fan (Singular)

March 13, 2026 The Dalhousie Mackerel
Dalhousie's Satirical Newspaper

Dalhousie's Satirical Newspaper

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