HALIFAX, N.S. — Dalhousie University’s most mysterious content creator, known only by his Instagram handle @thedalhousiepisser, has struck again — this time allegedly urinating on his Howe Hall roommate “for the views.”
The act, captured in a since-deleted story captioned “liquid loyalty challenge 💦💛,” has left campus security “deeply confused, moderately damp and entirely disappointed.”
“As I was trying to sleep, I heard trickling, and then I screamed,” said first-year commerce student and victim, Tyler Billy, while still holding a damp towel from the incident. “At first I thought the radiator was leaking, but no — it was Brad.”
Brad, better known online as the Dal Pisser, rose to infamy earlier this semester after uploading a series of short videos featuring himself urinating on various Dalhousie landmarks. Some of his past targets have included the Howe Hall front signage, Sherriff Hall’s front steps, Wickwire Field and, unfortunately, a local business, the Big General Store.
When contacted for comment via DM, Dal Pisser responded only with a single water droplet emoji and the phrase, “Stay hydrated, Dal Nation.”
The incident comes amid escalating tensions with rival Instagram personality @thedalhousiegooner, a self-described “campus vigilante” dedicated to “protecting Dal from the piss menace.”
“He’s turning campus into a splash zone,” the Dal Gooner said in an exclusive Mackerel interview.
In response, the Dal Pisser posted a video reclaiming the steps of the Big General Store by pissing on them. His caption of the kinky violation reads, “@thedalhousiegooner stay in your lane 🥱.” Big G became a target for the Dal Pisser following a post made by the Dal Gooner, who gooned on the steps earlier this week.
As this turf war breaks out between the Dal Pisser and the Dal Gooner, students have filed multiple hygiene complaints to Dalhousie’s board of governors. Dalhousie officials have yet to confirm whether disciplinary action will be taken. However, the university issued a brief statement early Tuesday morning.
“We’re actively trying to flush this behaviour out of campus culture. We encourage all students to express themselves in ways that do not involve pissing and gooning.”Despite widespread criticism, the Dal Pisser’s follower count has surged by over 8,000 followers, overtaking @dalmackerel in Instagram followers … this is unbelievable and gross.
By Matt Macdonald