HALIFAX, N.S. — Nowhere, not even the classroom is safe from the chokehold Sabrina Carpenter has on everyone you know. After hearing many reports from some very disturbed undergrads, we have confirmed a professor came to class dressed up in Sabrina’s iconic pink lingerie after describing the midterm as “Short n’ Sweet” in a previous class.
It seems the students attending the class had varied responses to the professor’s little stunt. “He ate,” was all one student had to say after being questioned about the incident.
Another student had different thoughts, “I’m all for body positivity, I’m just concerned
about how he is going to get out of an outfit like that. I mean, it looked like he might need assistance,” they explained.
The act has caused a divide among students and faculty alike. Those standing in solidarity with the professor have been seen walking around campus with brand new curtain bangs to show their support. Another professor has started beginning every lecture with a different “Juno pose” (which to be honest is a story all in itself).
Though the sudden change in wardrobe may have been a shock at first, it seems to have had an extremely positive effect on class attendance as there have been zero absences since the incident. Frankly, students are just excited to have an engaging lecture for once.
By Jonah Schwabb